Apologies To The Grinch, Part 2
Then they got an idea! . . . An awful idea!
[REDACTED] GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!
"We know what to do with the Data they send!"
"We'll tell them we lost it, start over again!'
And they chuckled, and clucked, "What a great money plan!"
"to make them buy ship parts, and lottos again"
♫
You're a Liar, [REDACTED]
Fixes were what was told;
But everything's more expensive
than even the days of old, [REDACTED]
now in chat they even advertise
for you to purchase Gold. ♫
"But will we keep players?", they searched all around;
"This game is unique, none like it was found."
Will vets leave? "No!" [REDACTED] said,
"We'll tell them the game would be otherwise DEAD."
"They'll be willing to play; again they shall sail,"
"like they kept on with running their race in LaTale!"
"We're Heros; we saved it" We'll say in a thread!"
♫
You're a rotter, [REDACTED].
You're the king of wiped-out slots!
Your vigor food is splotched
With moldy purple spots, [REDACTED].
Your "Rewards" are a pittance that will
never replace ships that sped at many knots! ♫
♫
"We'll take all their ducats, we'll take all their Billions,"
"and make them be grateful, to get a few millions!"
"And tutorials, and schools they'll have to redo,"
"They'll click click through Andrea, and even Mutu."
The players awaited, excitement in air.
Dreamed of the new server, without even a care.
Some used all their earnings, in the Captain's Chest,
In case they don't transfer, with all the rest.
Some even bought Astros, more space for their things,
Some bought some more skills, for when playing again.
They made sure they were early, to not get left out;
they made sure to register, to "transfer" accounts.
And then to their horror, it did come to light:
"Your info is gone! We had to do Wipe!"
"But, do not despair, we'll help Vets with the cost,"
"Based on their levels, with the info we "lost".
They gave players weeks, to mull over this,
and while they debated, and some said they'd quit,
They erased the colonies, rescinded port permits,
They emptied the stores, and took all the ships.
They took all the farms, they took all the ore
They took all the levels, and skills to get more.
They took all the vessels, all the cargo much big,
Put on a school cap, in place of afro wig.
The 100 attack Rapier Sword was just bought,
they took it away, with Swordplay, but they ought
to not have taken the 100 attack Breech Loader
one of two gifted, that sat on the shoulder.
The Circumnavigation Dress, in the missing quarters
would have to be earned, by doing it all over.
They took the Live Fish, pet food that was needed,
By an ex-Tortoise shell cat; the food that it eated.
They took all the factories, they took all the cans,
They took all the recipies to make honey and jam.
"We'll give them ship parts, which they cannot use,
"tell them it's replacements, for things they did lose"
and the Players searched long, and they searched hard
for an R20 Builder, with no ships they could Mod.
Nothing to Auction; C.P.Chick Who tried that,
Who could Not Do; without Merchant Chat.
The Pie Rats rejoiced, sang "O Happy Day!"
"We'll take what they get, and make them all pay,
and play the game RIGHT, they'll do it our way!"
"They'll find out about cash shop item Plunder"
"Well steal the Rare Finds, and put them asunder.
"They're just waking up! We know just what they'll do!"
"Their mouths will hang open a minute or two,
Then the Traders and Avdenturers will all cry "BooHoo!"
"That's a noise," grinned the Rats, "we simply MUST hear!"
So they paused. And the rats put their hands to their ear.
But all was quiet, no cries, could it be?
For this was not Pirates, Of The Burning Sea
The Toll Booths they set up, amid greedy drool.
Were actually empty; they expected them full.
"They're all epic seafood, to plunder and mame,
and if they don't like it, then find a new game!" -
Some took that advice, for they thought of the grind,
They now had a life, and they didn't have time,
to play 24/7, and they'd fall well behind
to a Mom's Basement Kid, with nothing to do,
but be Slappy Spacebar, and PEW PEW PEW PEW.
And thinking quite rationally, and weighing the fact
that they were deceived . . . They would only come back,
if their stuff, skills and levels, were returned intact.
Reurned all the tags! And the tinsel! The trimmings!
Returned all the stats from the great battle winnings.
Return all the ribbons! return all the tags!"
Return all the packages, boxes and bags!"
Return all the stuff that we all had before!
Give back our Colony, and exhibits in Store."
and give back the toys! And the food for the Feast
And Recipe Books . . . yes, to cook the Roast Beast
♫
You nauseate me, [REDACTED],
With a nauseous super "naus!"
You're a crooked dirty server
that wiped years without a cause, [REDACTED].
You're a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic and Oyster sauce! ♫
But, that will not happen, the Sheeple bent over,
to let them take all, with nothing to show for,
the years of the skills, the levels, the grind,
and even in cash shops, the sheeple is buying,
But this who will not Do, no, not this who Who
Who will not grind again, and completely redo.
To have years of accomplishments taken away
Thinking Who is so weak, to once again Pay . . .
Now Who's fun's reading forums; done everyday.
So I bid Who the best, to all Whos I say "bye,"
"Merry Chistmas to all, and [REDACTED], GOODBYE!"